Four days into it. How am I feeling? A bit overwhelmed. Still nervous and scared. A tad disappointed. But not ready to throw in the towel. I promised myself I'd stick out this year no matter what.
It's really not that bad. The days have litterally flown by, so I guess it's not "drudgery". It's simply just a matter of adjusting to a new life...all of us. I admit, so far it's not what I imagined. I had dreams of snuggling on the couch, reading classic literature to two adoring and totally absorbed girls. Instead, I have one who "hates" handwriting and phonics and wants to do harder and harder math (Erin), and another who rocks at spelling, but is sooooo slow at math and copy work.
It's mostly me. I have to figure out where they are in their learning, and then come up with a way to meet them there with the curriculum I have on hand. I have to figure out how schedule our day, making sure I am able to do one-on-one time with each when needed. And as soon as I figure this all out, Tony will go back to school and I'll have to go back to working in the mornings, and then I'll have to figure out the schedule all over again!
I'm realizing, though, that I need to carve out "me" time very quickly. For the past two months, this is all I have focused on. Not scrapping, organizing, exercising, reading for pleasure...just schooling. I had an "aha" moment last night regarding my time management. When the girls were in school, I had sort of "stopped everything" at 3:30 when they got home from school, so that I could be with them and available to them. Well, if I spend all day with them, there's really no reason that I can't have "my" time once we're finished with school. Hence, me here now. :)
Bottom line is that I'm grateful I read as much as I did before beginnig this journey. Learning from the experience of others, I know that this feeling passes, and things eventually do get easier.
Until then, just keep swimming...
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